Thursday, February 05, 2009

Being Stuck

I'm currently leading a master mind group in Detroit Lakes, Minnesota where we're studying Peter Block's newest book: Community: The Structure of Belonging and it's gotten me thinking - no surprise there!

I'm currently contemplating the chapter Peter titles "The Stuck Community" and I'm uncomfortable because I recognize myself in what I'm reading. I'm wondering why I'm uncomfortable ... because of being stuck or because of the realization of the possibility of being stuck?

The first line of Chapter 3 in Peter's book just jumped off the page at me today while I was reading: "To create a new story, we first need to come to terms with the current one. This begins by naming it."

What I read today was that to move beyond stuck, we first have to realize we are stuck. Denial doesn't work when we're stuck. And the underlying assumption in that statement is that at some point in all of our lives every one of us gets stuck.

I think about what I've been studying and learning since I saw The Secret in 2006. Shouldn't we just be able to THINK our way out of our stuckness? After all, don't we know better?

Sometimes knowing doesn't seem to be enough. That's why I'm so excited to get my hands on the followup to The Secret called "Beyond the Secret." According to my fellow LifeSuccess consultants who are featured in this movie, this will teach us things that The Secret didn't get to. We'll be able to take that great information and go even deeper.

Being stuck isn't a big deal - staying stuck can be. So let's call it like it is when we're stuck. According to Peter Block, that's when we can move beyond it.


At 3:33 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

You pushed one of my hot buttons with this: "Shouldn't we just be able to THINK our way out of our stuckness?"

No! One of the most important lessons in my life has been that there are place in which my best thinking gets me exactly nowhere (or even deeper in trouble)because the problem is not intellectual but physical, emotional, or (more often than not) spiritual. It was a painful lesson.

As someone once told me, "The key to understanding is understanding that there are things you will never understand."

I now view the mind as a tool and, like any tool, there are tasks for which it is useful and tasks for which it is not.

At 3:36 PM, Blogger Jodee Bock said...

I love that, Dick! "The key to understanding is understanding that there are things you will never understand!"

In case I was too evasive, I was being facetious when I said we should be able to think our way out of our stuckness. Isn't that what we're led to believe when we buy all the self-help stuff?

Thank you for this great feedback.

I can't wait to see you in June!!!

At 4:03 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yeah. I knew you were being facetious. But I still couldn't resist responding to that particular hot button.

At 6:40 AM, Blogger Jodee Bock said...

Here to serve (a.k.a. push hot buttons)!

At 8:09 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Is this what we learned in Landmark? To move into the future you have to clear your past. The past that is keep you stuck here in the present.
BTW, I just pre-ordered the DVD! I think our MS Mastermind will do a group viewing when it comes in. Thanks!

Dick: I'm looking forward to seeing you in June as well. Hurry up June!

At 9:44 AM, Blogger Bruce B said...

You struck a chord with me, too. Think of being stuck in snow or mud. When that happens, it's frustrating, it upsets the flow of the day, and it needs to be dealt with sooner rather than later.
One will need tools, and maybe a friend or tow truck (think life coach or Master Mind), to get unstuck.
There are some things we simply can't do alone. Becoming unstuck as in your definition may be one of them.

At 9:54 AM, Blogger Jodee Bock said...

Yes, Jeff - great activity for your MM Master Mind! Thanks for ordering it!

Bruce - I like the visual for what I do ... a tow truck driver with a shovel! The awareness comes when we realize we need to call for help, otherwise we just spin our wheels and think we can get out ourselves, or dig out ourselves, which often gets us in even deeper. STOP DIGGING and call the tow truck! That's what the new awareness is screaming at us.

Good stuff, everyone!

At 5:08 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

"I'm looking forward to seeing you in June as well. Hurry up June!"

Back at 'ya Jeff!

At 10:39 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

When I get "stuck", I often find that I need to do anything other than sit and think. Often times, I think we find ourselves over analyzing the situation and potential different outcomes in our mind and ultimately it leads to stagnation. Just taking some sort of action other than thinking helps me to begin the process of getting "un-stuck". Great post though - getting stuck is a very frustrating thing that everybody hits at some point or another. Few continue to push through at all costs - those who do are always happy they did.

At 11:00 AM, Blogger Jodee Bock said...

Yes, Jason - action is certainly one cure for procrastination; however, action for action's sake may actually get us more stuck. I heard a great story once the gist of which was "What do you do when you find yourself in a hole? Stop digging."

Of course if we can actually STOP that would be great. You mention analysis and thinking. That's not what it means to STOP in this case. Maybe we need to allow our intuition and our higher awareness actually have a chance to get through our busyness to give us new direction. That's what I mean by "artful action." Action with a purpose or action that follows a higher awareness.

So let's allow ourselves to BE just a little bit before we aimlessly DO in the midst of our stuckness. Maybe being stuck is a sign that we NEED to stop.

Thanks for the insight!!!

At 3:36 AM, Blogger Dr.Claude Windenberger said...

Asking WHY AM I STUCK with the purpose of understanding the stuckness will simply get you more stuck. Each additional or alternate reason for being stuck acts like an anchor for the unwanted condition you are stuck with. Realizing that there is no reason (I am just stuck. period) is the first step to becoming unstuck. The second step is simply being willing to be free from the unwanted condition you are stuck in. This can then happen right in that moment of choice of freedom, since there is no reason for the UC being there other than than you keeping it there. More on this at


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