Get the F out of here!
I've just got to sound off today about something that's been bugging me for a long time now. I'm learning that the best way to deal with things that frustrate or upset me is to just get them out in the open. I'm a verbal processor, so that means I have to either write or speak about those topics so I can move beyond them.
So today's rant is about that terrible four-letter F word that just sneaks into every part of many of our lives. It's not a new word or a new concept, but it's something we just don't deal with, so it keeps affecting us without us even realizing it.
Yes, I'm talking about F-E-A-R.
The really interesting thing about fear is that a great majority of the time the things we fear never really happen. In fact, I've heard FEAR has used as an acronym: False Evidence Appearing Real. The only authentic fear is fear caused by a situation which threatens our physical survival. In that case, we have a built-in "fight or flight" mechanism which triggers adrenaline and causes us to get to safety.
But anything other than that stimulus is actually inauthentic fear.
The most curious inauthentic fear I know is not the fear of failure. That's probably the most vocalized inauthentic fear - and probably the safest one to admit. Fear of failure keeps you from taking any action, and allows you to stay in the comfort zone where you can maintain some level of control over the outcome. It may not produce a desired result, but it produces a familiar one.
If you take no action, you won't fail, but you can't possibly achieve anything other than what you currently have.
No, the most curious fear I've identified is the fear of success. What if we really do achieve those goals we've dreamed about? Then what? What action will that force me to take? How much further out of my comfort zone will I have to be pushed then? The stories we make up in our heads are so often much worse than reality ever will be. That's the sneaky part about inauthentic fear.
What's a solution? Take a step - a BABY step - in the direction of your dream or goal. Even a baby step out of your comfort zone will provide a new perspective. Identifying the fears in our lives would be a super first step. Where are you complaining about something over which you have no control? That might provide another clue.
The conditions will never be perfect for taking action as long as you are stuck in alibi mode. That's where "Old Man If" has you bound. The entire epilogue of Think and Grow Rich is called "Outwitting the Six Ghosts of Fear" and one section identifies 57 alibis that may be preventing us from achieving our goals. Here's the greatest one of all, according to Napoleon Hill:
If I had the courage to see myself as I really am, I would find out what is wrong with me and correct it, then I might have a chance to profit by my mistakes and learn something from the experience of others for I know that there is something WRONG with me or I would now be where I WOULD HAVE BEEN IF I had spent more time analyzing my weaknesses and less time building alibis to cover them.
Where are you holding yourself hostage to a ghost of fear? How committed are you to changing that? Start today! Get the F out of there!